Saturday, February 27, 2010

Induction to Womanhood




I recently received an invitation to a “Baby Shower–Goddess Party” where the host invited her guests to share one significant story or insight from her own personal experience that makes her most appreciative and joyful about being a woman. I thought, cool, that’s something new that I had never done for a baby shower before. At first I thought it would be difficult to choose which story to tell, because I have many. But, then, one story jumped right to the front of the line. So, I thought I’d go ahead and share it here as well.

When I was thirteen years old I had hippy hair. You know, the long straight hair, down to my waist, all one length, parted right down the middle kind of hippy hair. My cousins even nicknamed me “Hippy”. My hair had been like that for most of my life up to that point. That is until one Saturday morning when I decided I wanted a change. I was ready to take that big step and move into the realm of “style”.

Well, this was big news to my mom. This called for a trip back to the old neighborhood where her longtime good friend Maria had her beauty shop, Maria’s Salon. I had never had my hair cut in a salon before, so this was a milestone event for me in that sense. I was a little nervous. Ok, a lot nervous.

We walked into the salon and it was packed with women. Every hair stylist was busy turning ordinary women into super models – well, at least in their own minds maybe. It was loud with female chatter. Maria walked up and greeted me with a big cheesy smile attempting to make me feel comfortable. It really DID NOT help.

She brought me over to her chair, sat me down and we began our back and forth dialog to determine what I wanted done to my hair. She then began to comb all of the knots out of my hair, which were many, since grooming was not a high priority on my list yet. I was too active with sports to be concerned about that sort of silly stuff. I usually just put my hair in a ponytail and went about my day. Anyway, as she was combing my hair she suddenly gasped and began saying something in Spanish, which I didn’t understand. She motioned to my mother and other women to come over to have a look at what she found in my hair. I just sat there watching these women making a big deal about something in my hair, but nobody was telling me what it was. I kept asking, “What? What is it?!” They were laughing, and making jokes, and patting me on the head telling me, “If anybody can fix this problem Maria can!” Then they all walked back to their stations, and mom back to her chair in the waiting area. I was baffled. Maria proceeded to pluck a hair from my tender scalp and dangled a 15” long, pure white strand in front of my face. “Here you go sweetie, your first gray hair.” My jaw dropped as I reached up and took hold of it.

I was mesmerized by this single strand of hair. I kept staring at it and wondered what could have caused me to have a gray hair at such a young age. My mind wandered off into deep thought about all of the things that had happened to me in my short 13 years of life that could have caused this. Many painful things, things that were more than a little girl should have to bare, things that others new nothing about, things that stole away my childhood, things that I vowed I would carry to my grave. I pondered long, asking myself, “Is this what this gray hair represents?” I looked around the room at the other women and began to wonder what kind of things they had experienced, because there was lots of gray hair all over. Some were hiding it with color, while others seemed to wear it like a badge of honor.

I was so engulfed in my thoughts that I wasn’t even paying any attention to Maria chopping away at my hair, drying it, and curling it. I was stuck someplace back in time. Then I heard this voice calling out my name like it was coming from a long distance away, but it was Maria bringing me back into the present moment to show me my new hairstyle. I snapped out of my dream state and looked up at myself in the mirror. There I was, the new me, with my new Farrah Fawcett feathered hair. My hands immediately cupped my mouth in amazement. I gasped with tickled joy. I loved it! Then Maria called out to the other ladies to have a look. They turned and began to do their ooohs and aaaaahs, and offer their supportive comments. Even the older lady sitting under the loud cone head hair dryer pulled off the giant bowl, walked over and said how beautiful I was.

In that very moment I realized that I had become part of the greater society of womanhood -- The camaraderie of sisterhood, the chums of common ground, the missionaries of goodness. I somehow felt different. I stood a little straighter and looked a little taller, especially with my puffy new hair. I was a young woman.


This is the only decent picture I could find with me and my Farrah Fawcett hairdo. Unfortunately, I have a hat on. LOL!










I didn't quite look like Farrah, did I? LOL!



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Wednesday, February 17, 2010

45 things I’ve learned in my 45 years

Well somehow I have reached 45! Woo Hoo!

I’m fine with my age and thought it would be fun to sit down and write 45 things that came to mind that I have learned in my 45 years. Some are silly and others just might make you go hmmm…

So here goes… 45 things I’ve learned in my 45 years
(OMG, after posting this and looking at how long the list is all I can say is Holy _ _ _ _!)

1. I love being in my 40s! (and I knew I would!)
2. Your mom isn’t always right… (unless your name is Mikhaila or Dakota and I’m your mom.)
3. Things you hear as a child really do STICK in a person’s head for years, so be careful what you say to children!
4. Gray hair looks kinda cool against my brown skin.
5. Being yourself is always the best way to go in the long run! Figuring out who “Your True Self” is on the other hand can often be the big challenge. The sooner you can figure that out the better.
6. Your formal education (or lack of) doesn’t have to determine the rest of your life.
7. Risks are rewarded – sometimes with wealth and other times with lessons to be learned.
8. There is always a silver lining if you are willing to look for it.
9. Having dreams is a wonderful thing. A few of my dreams have come to fruition, and I still have more dreams that I want to accomplish. YAY!
10. Living in this time of exponential, high-speed, rapid change is fascinating and comes with all sorts of interesting things like Facebook, which has re-connected me with some really wonderful people from my past that I probably would not have reconnected with if Facebook didn’t exist.
11. It’s awesome, amazing, and incredibly humbling to do what I do! I give thanks to my Heavenly Father for my gifts, and hope that what I do with my talents helps to open doors to his love.
12. Being a parent is really, really hard work, and full of every emotion on the face of the earth, plus I'm certain there are even a few that we haven’t given names to yet. (But it's so worth it!)
13. Everyone doesn’t always choose the best partner. Pick again. (But not the same person with a different name – lots of people seem to do that too! – I did; lesson finally learned? √ check)
14. Sex is definitely better at this age! No more hang ups there!
15. I really love dancing, and I’ll never stop dancing ever again! (when I did I was not a happy camper!)
16. Having just a few great friends is really wonderful.
17. Shoe size has nothing to do with anything except how big your feet are. LOL!
18. Finding someone who gets you is something to be cherished!
19. Laughter is an awesome way to spend time.
20. Travel to foreign countries expands your perspective.
21. Trust your intuition, even if it goes against everyone else’s advice. You usually know what’s best for you.
22. Due to Social media I can get the word out about what I do for hardly any money, with no special technical ability, to tens of thousands or even millions of people, in a matter or days or even minutes. WOW!
23. “If you don’t ask, the chances of getting a “yes” are slim to none.”
24. “The worst that can happen is they say no.” (I’ve discovered you can always survive that and move on to better things.)
25. I have found a way to make work = fun. Yippee!
26. God's forgiveness and my own forgiveness saved me and delivered me from so much pain.
27. Most of my emotional walls are down, now I only have a few hang-ups (LOL!)
28. Sometimes it really is ok to sit and do nothing… for hours.
29. Sometimes you get what you pay for. Other times you get more or less… be careful how you spend your money.
30. I enjoy a good glass of wine with good friends.
31. Not everyone is meant to stay in our lives forever but everyone that comes into your life serves a purpose or provides a lesson you need to learn.
32. I’m not bitter, vengeful, or regretting my two previous marriages, which is like a modern day miracle! More than anything I just didn’t want to waste my energy on something that would only make me lonely and ugly both inside and out.
33. It’s ok to admit that you were wrong.
34. Our beliefs don’t always make sense – even to ourselves! Keep the ones that work for you and try to change the ones that hold you back.
35. Knowing yourself and being honest with yourself is the key to all things.
36. Success is more than the size of your bank account.
37. Time really does seem to pass more quickly the older you get!
38. I like to know how everything works. Which can cause me to do more than I should by myself. I also have trouble turning it off at night. I’m still working on that one.
39. I’m “micro-social” – I would choose to be with small groups of people over large gatherings.
40. Being able to choose my own ring tone is a fun little feature in life among many others.
41. There is no “right answer” that will work for everyone. (No matter what the question is.)
42. Having kids has turned out to be one of the best decisions I ever made in my life.
43. I love kind little gestures like the man that always smiles and greets me by my name who owns my favorite hole in the wall Mexican restaurant, Barbudos.
44. The crevasses that time has carved into the landscape of my face have earned me the right of passage into the company of many wonderful women.
45. I’m excited to see what this next year brings…
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