The Sum of Us

Are we the sum
of everyone
who has been a part of our life?

Just a few days ago I heard someone say that we are the sum of everyone who has been a part of our life. I’m sure there is a lot of truth to that, although, I don’t think it’s complete. It's not the first time I've heard that comment before; nevertheless, for some reason, this time, ever since I heard that comment it has crossed my mind quite a bit.

Labeled 36" x 36" original oil painting by Melanie Banayat

So now I keep having all these little memory flashes of the many different people that have been a part of my life. Some of these people that are popping into my thoughts I haven’t heard from or seen in over 25 – 30 years. I keep wondering how all these people have contributed to the molding of the person I am today. I mean some people (the major people in my life) are easy to figure out for the most part: family members, teachers, bosses, co-workers, closest friends, and then of course there's the "bad people" - the people who did unthinkable things. I know how all these people helped mold me.

But what about the seemingly random people? Those people who were really only a part of my life for a short time. Those people who were just a small part of my life, but left such big marks. For some reason I have allowed some of these people and their comments, or the experiences I had with them, to affect and influence my life in some pretty significant ways.

For instance, I remember a girl in 7th grade named Dena; she repeatedly made fun of a certain body part on me (which I'm not going to tell you about) that left this mental scar with me even to this day. Silly, I know. Especially since I was never a friend with this girl, never hung out with her, and she probably has no idea how her comments have stuck with me all these years. Oh, it’s easy to say, she was only putting me down to make herself feel better, which is probably true. The fact is, growing up is hard, and kids can be so mean to each other -- that is just a part of life that can either crush us or toughen us up.

So now, good ole’ Dena has made her way back into my life, and she doesn’t even know it. LOL! However, I’m happy to say that ‘body part’ that she made fun of so long ago has recently found an admirer. Although I have to admit, I can’t help but wonder why he likes that part of me so much, because every time I look at that part of me I feel self conscious about it. At least now I’m able to laugh about the whole thing, and say to myself, “What the Hell, he likes that part of me! Sweeeeet – the healing has begun!”

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The Sum of Us